Here I am.

Isn’t it a shame that I haven’t had a chance to update this blog since the day before I got to New Jersey? I’ll answer that, it is! Even though I sit on a train for two hours back and forth to work every day, I still haven’t had the time or energy to write about my personal experiences. And maybe I didn’t want to, because I didn’t feel ready.

Very honestly, there’s no way I can capture everything that’s happened in the meantime and I’m not going to try. But I will say this … it’s been nuts. Really, really nuts. Some alternative words to describe my time back East so far include: Crazy, Overwhelming, Busy, Hard, Exciting, Nerve-racking, Frustrating, Happy, Sad, Too busy to stand and Taxing.

It’s been more difficult than I thought it was going to be. My commute is long but I don’t want to live in the city. I’m missing Cisco and worrying about him a lot. Money issues put up a good fight and I’ll admit, I’m feeling defeated. Work has been super hectic and ‘me time’ has been nonexistent. My GPS broke, so I get lost wherever I go. And I have new bags under my eyes that are not my favorite accessory.
Do you feel sorry for me yet? Well, please don’t. You shouldn’t.

The fact is, I’m in the middle of a huge transition and yes, it’s hard. But you know what? There are harder things in life. And there are people lifting me up along the way.

Mom and dad have been awesome – I feel like I am coming back after college and although they were comfortable in their calm empty nest, they are willing to put up with all of my ‘baggage’ once again. Twenty dollars here, a ride back and forth there, a garage full of boxes and tons of laundry later, they don’t skip a beat. And I’m really grateful for that.

Also, since I’ve joined the Newcomb family, my new roommates have been nothing short of amazing. When I arrived, they had banners and balloons at the door of my room that read ‘Welcome Home.’ They’re still up. Not only does Jamie go out of her way to make me feel like I’m one of them (she literally makes me dinner, saves me leftovers and sometimes she even packs my lunch), but Sean does too. And I’m sure that’s not easy. I’m the long lost best friend who wants to watch Bride Wars, go to kick-boxing and have girl talk with his wife all the time – that has to suck for him! But he’s been an absolute trooper - grilling out, picking me up from the train station and grocery shopping as a trio. Last week, after a particularly tough day, I came home to the two of them holding a glass of wine with my name on it and serving up cheese, crackers and hummus. Honestly, they’re too much. (But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love it.)

And as for the rest of my besties, they’ve been simply outstanding too. From Stacy, Nancy and Jamie treating me to pizza when the well had run dry after our road trip and my ‘posse’ in Cali checking up on me like it’s their job, to Chelsea bringing Meatball presents as to not leave the little one out and Diana tucking me in on her couch because I couldn’t muster up a mere conversation at 9pm on a Saturday, they are my saviors. Today is just the 17th day I’ve been home and already I’ve gotten to celebrate Aunt Patty’s 50th b-day with my favorites, spend Mother’s Day with my entire family (great grandmother included), have margaritas with the girls and continue the party at an old local bar with Di and hold my new nephew Marco while he toots on me. I've been lucky enough to lounge around on a Friday night with friends, go ‘Mother of the Bride’ dress shopping with the lady herself and introduce my dog to his new cousin Tank. And finally, I've reconnected with those I haven’t seen in forever and had the great pleasure of eatting my mom and future mom-in-law’s home cooking until I could just barf – in a good way.

THESE are the things I came home for.

Now, the only problem is that I am missing my other half ... and when he does get home, things will probably move so fast toward the wedding that our heads will spin out of control.

But I hope we stop and enjoy this time. Because as nuts as it is right now, it’s life … and we’ll never get to do it again. So I’ll try to keep my end of the bargain and appreciate every bit of it, even when my train is stuck in the middle of a 90 minute ‘traffic delay’ – like now.